Things That Didn’t Happen

Image by Stephanie Holland from Pixabay

This holiday season, I am thankful for all the usual things like a warm home, food, clothing, etc. However, I won’t lie. I’m not thankful my husband won’t be with me this holiday season. 

I will spend the holidays with my son, daughter-in-law, and granddaughters, which will be special, something I haven’t done in many years, but there will still be a missing part. Times alone. Even so, I’m trying to keep a positive attitude and not dwell on what is missing.

A pastor friend posted a comment on social media. Even if we can’t bring ourselves to be thankful for our current situation, we can be thankful for the things that didn’t happen. As the old saying goes, things can always be worse.

The thought is similar to the sentiment in the Garth Brooks song, Thankful for Unanswered Prayers. Life experience has taught me to avoid praying for particular things and just ask God for help. How can I presume to tell God what’s best? Regardless of the situation, like missing my husband, God will help me through it. And not just me. All of us.

So, this Thanksgiving, I’m thankful for what I have — and for the things that didn’t happen.

Amen.

 

Thankful

 

Happy Thanksgiving! 

May your day be filled with many joys and blessings. 

Needs

Image by Dorothe from Pixabay

This memory popped up this week, and with Thanksgiving approaching, it seems as relevant now as when I first posted it back in November 2011. 

Needs

I've spent much of my life clinging to a job, a home, financial security, husband, children, and parents, expending a ton of emotional and physical energy. I am not saying we shouldn’t care about people or things, we should. We need relationships. We need things in order to survive, but we need God more.

One of my devotions mentioned a popular chain e-mail. It asked, "Suppose you're house was burning, with all of your family already safe, you have just enough time to take one item with you, what would you chose?"

What if God came to the door and said, "Come." Would I say goodbye to family first or would I have enough faith and trust in Him to step out the door, leaving everything behind? I decided I could just walk away. How could I refuse God when he was standing at the door? 

Another image formed. With nothing but the clothes I was wearing, I embarked on a journey with Him. For a woman who carries a large purse everywhere, and always has multiple suite cases when traveling, this was an intoxicating concept. He even made keeping up with Him easy, matching His pace to mine, and carrying me when I became too tired to walk.

We were deep into a wooded area, far from any town, when night descended. A thunderstorm struck, soaking my clothes within seconds. I could no longer see God or feel His touch. As I considered my desperate situation, a large lightning flash revealed a small cave only a few steps in front of me. The floor of the cave was sandy and dry, but I still shivered in the night chill. I wondered why God had brought me there and then just left, leaving me to die of exposure and hunger.

Lightning hit the tree just outside the mouth of the cave and ignited one of the large limbs. It fell a within arm's reach, and with minimal effort I drug it further into the cave. My clothes were soon dry, and the blaze held off most of the night chill, but I was still hungry, tired and alone.

Even in my misery, I knew God would do two things. He would either provide food, warmer shelter, and everything else I needed to continue the journey  - or He would take me Home where he would fill all my needs, even those beyond my imagination. With that in mind, I could endure short-term hunger and a little cold.

God came to the cave and sat next to me.He entertained me with stories and amazing natural wonders. He assured me that although I missed dinner, breakfast would be indescribable and told me how much He loved me.

I fell asleep, curled next to the fire, covered with a blanket of God's love and peace. No worries, no concerns. I didn't make any do lists or minute by minute plans for the next morning. Nor did I check off a list of all the things I failed to accomplish that day, nor did I recite any list of transgressions. I followed God, and that was all I was required to do.

Now, I can say, if the house was on fire, or if God knocked and said, "Come." I would walk away, leaving everything. I would be selfish (according to the world's point of view, but God will take care of my loved ones and everything else). By choosing God above everything else, life becomes simpler and far less stressful. My burdens are much lighter, especially when I let him carry most of the load.

Thank you, Lord, for being my most gracious Father and for all the blessings you have granted me throughout my life. Amen. 

Fantasy vs Reality

Photo by Johannes Pleino from Pixabay

I finished reading a well written, intriguing fantasy novel. The premise held my interest and kept me turning pages, but one thing bothered me.

Demons and evil wizards took the souls of the men and women they killed, condemning them to an eternity in hell. No one had the power to save them. Imagine a world where there isn’t any hope of salvation — ever.  


Do I want the author to change her story? No. Not to please me or anyone else. She wrote the novel as she saw it, but I am thankful I live in a different reality. I have a Savior who died in my place, saving me from eternal damnation.  As long as I cling to Him, my faith, no demon, nor the fires of hell, can touch me.

I am thankful I read the book. Stories are a powerful way of expressing ideas, illustrating comparisons, and teaching life lessons. This one will haunt me for a long time. May I never forget the message of how blessed I am to be living in this broken, but beautiful world.   

If I Hadn't ...

Photo from PublicDomainPictures @ Pixabay

If I hadn’t gone through years of domestic violence, a rough divorce, and buried two husbands, would I appreciate my current husband and happy marriage as much as I do?

If I hadn’t suffered several life-threatening illnesses, would I be as thankful for my present good health?

If I hadn’t struggled with years of financial difficulties, would I appreciate my current financial stability?

If I hadn’t worked at several stressful jobs, would I appreciate and enjoy my retirement as much?

Without God’s compassion and support, could I see the world as a wonderful place filled with miracles?

Rainbows come after a storm. Silence is more noticeable after loud noises. Joy is more recognizable after sorrow, health after illness, wealth after poverty.

Through these, God has taught me where true happiness lies — in the simple things: coffee at sunrise with my devotions, chatting with my husband, walking with Cooper in the early morning and at sunset, keeping in touch with friends and family, and the time and ability to pursue my passions.

I think of Israel Kaʻanoʻi Kamakawiwoʻole’s hit song, Somewhere Over the Rainbow. He combines Somewhere Over the Rainbow with What a Wonderful World, two of my favorite songs. They represent every blessing God has given me — the things most precious in this life.

As Melanie Rigny wrote in Living Faith, “What do you want to present when you face the Lord: a list of what you owed, or a list of whom you loved?”

I am included in that list. Have I forgiven myself as I have forgiven others? Have I cared for my needs? Have I allowed myself to rest?  Have I given myself permission to be happy?  

Thank you, Lord, for leading me through life's difficulties toward true happiness, which includes loving myself. My joy overflows and spreads out to others, enveloping them in the same love you give me. Amen.

Light in the Darkness

I’ve been reflecting on the recent tragedies, seeking a way to cope with the sense of hopelessness and despair these horrific events seem to nurture.

A meme a dear soul posted on Facebook had one answer. Mr. Rodgers said, “Look for the helpers.” There are always men and women who risk everything to help others whether it is horrific fires like those in California, shootings or floods.

I want to be a helper rather than sitting back, crying and wringing my hands, or worse criticizing. I may never race through flames, face a crazed gunman, or slog through flood waters to save a life, but I can refuse to give into frustrations and irritations. I can be polite, smile, and carry a pleasant attitude whether I am at the grocery store, driving or doing my civic duty.

These thoughts reminded me of the Prayer of St. Francis. I memorized it years ago but I forget to pray it, so I created a prayer card which I printed out and placed with my devotions, a reminder of how I can be a helper, every day, wherever I am.

May we be thankful for the helpers God sends to those in need.

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you. May your day be filled with family, joy and many blessings.

(You are welcome to save, print, and share.)

Month Three—Almost There

No wonder my surgeon waits two months from the last saline fill before performing the next surgery. It’s day five, and I’m still tender from the muscle spasms, and the rock on my chest has grown to a boulder. My surgeon assures me this will subside as my muscles and tissues expand.

I take hope and strength knowing I am almost done. Only the surgery to remove the expander and place the prosthetic is left, besides the last six weeks of recovery.

This experience has broadened my view on many things. The number of other women I have encountered who have, or had, breast cancer and undergone mastectomies and reconstruction is much larger than I comprehended. According to my oncologist, one out of eight women are diagnosed with breast cancer in their lifetime. No wonder I know so many, including myself.

Even without dealing with cancer in one of its many forms, few of us escape this life unscarred or unscathed in some way. How well we adapt depends on many factors. For me, faith is at the top of the list. Prayer has seen me through this difficult time and my preceding trials. Attitude comes next. Anger, although natural, can adversely affect healing and places extra strain on our mental stamina. Denial can be dangerous, causing us to neglect to act promptly. With cancer, time is not our friend. I found acceptance and trust to be the most powerful attributes of my faith in any situation.

With my recovery and reconstruction almost complete, I thank God for every pain free day.
Something I will never again take for granted. Another thing I will not take for granted is time. I have slowed down my usual hectic pace and enjoy His gifts more fully, no longer rushing my prayers or my devotions. After prayer, I place time spent with my husband, parents, children, and friends at the top of my To Do list. My plans to develop and use my talents are still in place, but not at the forced, frenzied pace I’ve used in the past.

Life can change with my next breath, and none of us know our expiration date. It is a shame to waste a single moment not loving, praying, smiling, laughing, and being thankful.

The Simple Things

Unless something, like a surgery, upsets our daily routine, we don’t realize how many things we take for granted, like reaching for a shelf above our heads, bending down to pick something up from the floor, or pushing a grocery cart.

Exercise has improved my mobility, but the expander complicates some movements. It’s rigid and I can feel it move against my chest muscle despite the sutures stabilizing it. This is not painful per se, but not comfortable either.

The good news, the prosthetic will replace it in about two months. (Two more saline fills and a six month wait period before that surgery.) The implant will allow a more natural movement, but it will never be the same as biological tissue. I still prefer it to a flat space and a large scar.

Even if movement isn’t always comfortable, there are many who would trade places, restricted movement better than none. Something I need to remember whenever I’m frustrated. It could be so much worse.

I often think of St. Paul and the sufferings he encountered. He remained hopeful and cheerful despite appalling circumstances.

“None of these things move me.” Acts 20:24.

Someday, I hope I can say the same.

And The Rocket's Red Glare, the Bombs Bursting in Air - Right Over My House

It happens every year, beginning several days before the holiday, but really winds up on the 3^rd and the 4^th. Last night I imagined I was standing aboard ship with Francis Scott Key until dawn’s early light. 

I don’t complain, but it does wreck my sleep for a few nights. This year we also delayed picking up our new puppy until the 6^th. (Yes, my neighbor’s exuberance lasts five days.) The breeder kindly agreed to the postponement. He lives out in the country, away from the usual celebrations attached to this holiday, and we all deemed it safer for our pup.

Next year, we will have little Cooper conditioned to loud noises and our neighbor’s fun won’t bother him. We did this with all of our previous Brittanys and loud noises never bothered them. They ignored thunder, gunshots, and fireworks, except our first, Rusty. When the rockets would go off, he would run to the window to watch. 

 In general, I have great neighbors, and I don’t begrudge them their twice a year celebrations. (New Year’s is almost as rambunctious as the 4^th.) And, I am only mildly complaining. Each rocket that shook the house reminded me of our freedoms, hard won by the blood and sacrifices of brave men and women. From our Founding Fathers to our current volunteer armed forces, we owe a great debt. 

It is sad to know many no longer remember the reason behind this holiday, and others, such as Memorial Day and Veteran’s day. We need to keep our heritage alive, never let it slide away, forgotten. Our freedom came at too high a price to forget. 

So, as each rocket bursts through the sky over my house, I will remember Francis Scott Key and the reason he penned our national anthem. A few hours of lost sleep is small sacrifice. 

May our flag always fly over this land, and may we never, never forget why we celebrate.