Merciful Wisdom

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

There was a reason God took my husband sooner than I had hoped. One I didn't realize until just recently. 

My sister holds a PhD in Experimental Psychology, the study of human development focusing on the brain. I shared my husband’s MRI brain scans with her. She pointed out other abnormalities in the scans besides the cancer. The brain surgeon didn't address them. He focused on the tumor, the acute, life-threatening issue.

However, the abnormalities, unusual dark spots, my sister diagnosed were signs of early dementia. So, even if the cancer had not taken my husband, it was likely he would have suffered from another form of deterioration. Only divine wisdom understood which course was the most merciful.

In our limited knowledge, we look at the immediate, the current circumstances and make judgements and choices based on them, not realizing there’s always more that we cannot see or understand. 

All that leads us back to prayer, discernment, and following God’s will even when it hurts. We don’t know if this current tragedy is saving us or our loved ones from even worse circumstances. My husband would not have wanted the slow deterioration and to become a burden on me. Nor would I have wanted to lose him twice. Once to dementia and then to death.

I pray God will always give me the strength and the faith to surrender to His will. God never makes mistakes. He is never wrong. He is merciful, wanting what is ultimately best for us and those we love.

Dear Lord, thank you for your mercies, even if they appear as additional suffering. Amen.

Surrender

 

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay 

The word surrender has cropped up several times in various ways over this last week. I believe God is giving me a New Year’s resolution.

All of these popped up this morning. 

Surrendering to God’s will, regardless of the situation, is a challenge. After all, we would have to give up our perception of control, and that's not easy. 

A friend once told me she admired how well I handled my tragedies and losses. My reply, “I had no choice.” It was true. However, in these situations, rather than wallow in self-pity, I surrendered it all to God, and things worked out better than I imagined. But not at first. I still had to deal with the physical and emotional aspects of the circumstances. Only my faith, hope of a better future, eased the pain.   

Worrying won’t change the future. Either it will happen, or it won’t. And if it does, then God will help me through it, just as He as in the past.

In Our Daily Bread for, Bill Crowder quoted theologian Jürgen Moltmann’s definition of optimism and hope from A Theology of Hope. “Optimism is based on the circumstances of the moment, but hope is rooted in God’s faithfulness — regardless of our situation.”

So Lord, I surrender my life to Your will. I’ll let you handle it, even if it’s not in the way I want. You know what I need. I also commit my loved ones into Your hands. You know their needs as well. And Lord, I pray for all those facing difficult times. Be with them. Amen.