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Showing posts from January, 2011

Some Where Over the Rainbow - Part Two

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The next dramatic incident involving the song Some Where Over the Rainbow happened several years later during another difficult time. The nature of my anxiety is not really important, and so I will not bother with details other than the situation caused nausea and nightmares. It felt as though I had been dropped into a black hole without any hope of rescue. I prayed. I read my devotions. I meditated. Still, I felt submerged in a pit too deep to get out of. Just going to work was a struggle. At the time I was a receptionist for an Assisted Living Community and part of my job was keeping the old time jukebox playing. On this particular morning the machine was stuck on one song, a classic hymn such as This Rugged Cross. Nothing wrong with the song, except Tuesday morning breakfast was not the time our residents cared to listen to it. I tried changing the CD. Didn't work. I tried re-programming. Didn't work. Tried unplugging it and plugging it back in. Didn't work. At this po…

Some Where Over the Rainbow

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When my third husband passed away my sister gave me a beautiful book of Maxfield Parrish prints, breathtaking landscapes coupled with the words to  Some Where Over the Rainbow. The book and the song became beacons of hope, heralds of miracles I believed, prayed, were yet to come. I kept the book close, referring back to it frequently when I felt overwhelmed with grief and uncertainty.

A few years later while on vacation in Hells Canyon in Eastern Oregon, I became very ill. Somehow I had contracted an infection which quickly turned into a staph infection and then to blood poisoning.  The nurse-practitioner in the little community of Half Way announced I should be hospitalized, but did not believe I would survive the sixty mile trip to Baker City. My only option, other than a Mercy Flight, was treatment in the clinic.

After an injection of the most powerful antibiotic available, plus a prescription for an equally strong oral antibiotic, I was restricted to complete bed rest - flat on …

Inferno

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Palm Sunday. A lazy morning. Slept late. Ron and the kids slept even later. Church wouldn’t be an option that morning. I took the second option, reading the Passion while having my coffee.

I read the familiar words, resisting the temptation to hurry through. When I reached the end, I realized for the first time how personal the passage was. Not intellectually, but intimately, in my heart. For the first time I fully realized Jesus did indeed die for my sins. He died in my place. I collapsed onto the dinning table, sobbing.

An overwhelming desire to attend church propelled me into the bedroom. I had to go, even if I crawled the entire distance on my knees.

Ron rolled over and sat up. “What are you doing?”

“Going to Church.”

“Now?”

“Yes. I have twenty minutes to get there. You and the kids don’t have to come, but I have to go.”

By the time I was finished, he was dressed. I had another surprise when I headed for the door. All the kids were ready and actually waiting. That never happened…

Dream Come True

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I met my second husband in September, five months after the divorce. He told me he loved me by December. We were engaged by January and married the following June.


We went to the Oregon coast for our honeymoon. It rained the entire week. On the last day we headed south on Highway 101. As we entered a long sweeping corner, the sun came out and Ron opened the roof on our red Peugeot. I recognized the white guardrail, the cobalt ocean, and the emerald hills from my dream all those years ago.

“Honey, we are going to have a child – a girl.”

Ten months later our daughter was born, premature. Her lungs were not developed and she could not breathe on her own. She was rushed by ambulance to a neo-natal center seventy miles away. Ron and I stayed by her beside, praying an fearing the worse. Then, miraculously on the third day, she was taken off the ventilator before brain damage could set in. She improved daily and finally after fourteen days we brought her home.

Ron was the father the boys …

Back to the Future

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I wrote this post all most two years ago not realizing at the time the words of comfort and hope would be exactly what I would need in the future, touching my heart more profoundly at the time they were actually meant to be read. Of course, I didn't look into a crystal ball and foresee my future. It was God who knew I would need these words at this exact moment in my life, and He used me as His intstrument months in advance. I find that amazing, even though I know it is so like Him to do just that. 

Disappointment. After a year of working in a temp to hire position the company wide hiring freeze is still in effect. There is no estimate as to when it will be lifted.
I asked, prayed, should I look for another job? In this economy, I am very lucky to have this one. I do have a steady paycheck, not much else, but it is income. Many don’t have even that. Instead of being selfish, I need to be thankful. But, it is hard to accept the fact I will be in a state of limbo with the company fo…

Answered Prayer

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For eleven months a co-worker has jumped at every chance to point out mistakes I have made. Although the woman works in another department, one week a month she relieves me at the front desk for breaks and lunch. Since I perform clerical back up to all departments I often carry out tasks for her. Nothing is ever done to her satisfaction and I receive numerous lectures on how to be professional and how important it is to be accurate. I accept the points and tips to perform better and brush off the insinuations that I am purposely being negligent - until last week.
I was responsible for a huge project affecting all regional offices including ours. (We are the Regional office for one and a half states.) Unfortunately, this project was one this woman has handled for the past eight years. Her criticism has me paranoid to the point of doubting my self on everything I do, not just this project. She got under my skin and it is affecting my job and I have to find a way to handle the situation…