The Fourth Watch

Selling a home, buying a new one, and moving is a nightmare of huge proportions. No wonder it is the third most stressful life event. If I had more faith, the process would not be so heart wrenching, but like Peter walking on water, I looked at my circumstances, doubted and sank beneath the turbulence of documents and time restrictions.

I failed to trust God.

He gave me a promise the first time I stood in the new house.  He swathed in a blanket of warmth and I heard the word, home. We would live in the house for the rest of our lives. Whatever challenges lay ahead were only bumps along the way. All I had to do was trust.

I was like Peter starting out strong, then succumbing to fear. Then, during the fourth watch of the loan process, Matthew 14:22-23 was listed among my devotions. Yes, the story of Peter walking toward Jesus on a stormy sea.

Jesus’ words echoed in my heart. “Oh, you of little faith, why did you doubt?”

In my weakness, I let circumstances overrule my faith.

However, I never stopped clinging, praying, and begging for strength.

We are now in the final phase. In less than a week, it will all be over.

I would like to say I will never doubt God’s word again, but I will. My human frailty will overcome my faith, and I’ll falter. However, there is no need to despair. God will pick me up, dust me off, and carry me the last few steps. Every. Single. Time.