November 02, 2013

Choosing to Believe

Our loan officer announced our application has gone to the underwriters and a decision should be made within the next two or three days. It is hard not to be anxious. We are ready to settle down and stop moving from place to place and from house to house. It seems now is the perfect time. The house is perfect. The price is perfect and interest rates are the lowest they have been in years, and yet, is it God's will for us?

So far, the issues of the down payment, the closing costs, the inspection costs and the appraisal costs have evaporated, all taken care of in ways we did not foresee. My heart says not to worry, but my mind still conjures images of things that could yet go wrong - until.


Bill and I watched a movie, a loose portrayal of an actual event. Two kids in the 1950s go on a killing rampage across South Dakota and Wyoming. Not exactly the expected source of divine confirmation, and yet, at one point in the movie the two were hiding out in a make shift tree house in a desolate area surrounded by floodwaters. Among some of the odd things they took from the girl's house before they burned it down, were a fancy lamp and a painting.

It could have been any painting chosen for this scene. Of course it was one with personal significance, a Maxfield Parish print. As I have shared before, after my late husband's death my sister gave me a book of these prints coupled with the words from, Somewhere Over the Rainbow. This song, and references to it, has heralded miracles in the past.

Rainbows were mentioned twice in my morning devotions. The first from Streams in the Desert, quoting Genesis 9:13: "I will set my bow in the clouds, and it shall be the sign of a covenant between me, and between the earth." And between God and me?

The number three is another symbolic number, thus rainbows mentioned three times in the span of a few hours. These signs reinforce God's directive not to be anxious in anything.

My other listed devotion was from Romans 8:28. "And we know that to them that love God, all things work together unto good, to such as, according to His purpose, are called to be saints."

That was not all. The next listed reading was from Psalm 13:6: "But I have trusted in thy mercy. My heart shall rejoice in thy salvation: I will sing to the Lord, who giveth me good things: yea I will sing to the name of the Lord the most high."

And, God didn't stop there. My reading from, Good Morning, Lord, by Joseph T. Sullivan was titled, Divine Signs. "I see your hand here, Lord, leading us from creation to creator. Help me read other signs too. You communicate yourself constantly. Let me know you are near…"

We watched another program, a re-run of an old favorite, Touched by an Angel. The story began in Oregon, my home state, and followed the characters to Boise, Idaho, my current place of residence. I giggled at the coincidence.

After the program, I clicked on a social site I had not been active on in quite a while. The first post was a composite of the best auditions of the X-Factor. The first performance was by a young girl from Zimbabwe. I giggled again, since my husband and I were married in that country, and the story behind that is another incident of trusting in God's promises regardless of my circumstances - the fulfillment of my heart's desire for a companion to grow old with in health. After being divorced once and widowed twice, this was not a small promise.

Two performances later was another surprise and reminder of another of God's promises. A young woman performed, What a Wonderful World. Another song tied into a miracle. It is the one song my husband and I consider to be Our Song. During a previous crises, and resulting miracle, this song was coupled with, Somewhere Over the Rainbow, literally, with verses of both songs being sung alternately, and also represents God's faithful promises.

What is the meaning of all this? God is simply reminding me of His past miracles, that He is still in control of my life, and He still loves me, regardless of my circumstances. As the heroine in my soon-to-be published book states, "Again comes the choice to believe, to trust and then act."

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