February 23, 2011

A Companion To Grow Old With

There would be no last minute cure, no miracle. Shannon was dying. I fell to my knees.

“Lord, why aren’t three enough? Why can’t I keep this husband?”

At that exact moment the narrator on the audio book said, “Don’t you know four completes the circle?”

No. Impossible. It was just a random comment from an audio book. Even if it was meant for me, what were the chances of finding another good man? I had already found two. Impossible.

The next day my daily devotions included Luke 1:37: For nothing is impossible with God.
I still refused to believe God was giving me the promise of another companion. I was convinced I would indeed spend the rest of my life alone, but God had a different plan.

For the next seven days, as I paged from one listed reading to the next, my bible fell open to the Book of Tobias, Chapter 10 – the wedding of Sara and Tobias. Sara was married seven times. Each of her husbands was killed by a demon on their wedding night. Sara, naturally distraught, believed she was cursed and would remain unwed for the rest of her life, enduring the scorn of other women. God did intend her to have a husband – Tobias. On their wedding night the couple knelt in prayer. Verse 10: Sara also said: Have mercy on us, O Lord, have mercy on us, and let us grow old both together in health.

I closed my Bible, my head bowed with grief. I wasn’t growing old with any of my husbands. Why was God rubbing it in my face? Not just once, but over and over?

That afternoon I received a beautiful sympathy card from a close friend. In a personal note she quoted Psalm 37: But the salvation of the just is from the Lord and he is their protector in the time of trouble. 40 And the Lord will help them and deliver them: and he will rescue them from the wicked, and save them because they have hoped in him.

I read and re-read the passage, clinging to its message of hope.

The next morning, Psalm 37 was listed in my devotions: Trust in the Lord, and do good and dwell in the land, and you shall be fed with its riches. 4 Delight in the Lord, and he will give you the requests of your heart. 5 Commit your way to the Lord, and trust in him, and he will do it. With the Lord, shall the steps of a man be directed, and he shall like well his way. 24 When he shall fall he shall not be bruised, for the Lord puts his hand under him. 39 But the salvation of the just is from the Lord, and he is their protector in the time of trouble. 40 And the Lord will help them and deliver them: and he will rescue them from the wicked, and save them because they have hoped in him.

I chalked it up to just another coincidence. I picked up the book my son gave me, a devotional by David Jeremiah titled A Bend in the Road - What to do when your world comes crashing down. The first page I read quoted Psalm 37.

The Psalm was quoted three times within twenty-four hours from three different sources. Coincidence? I wished with all my heart it was true, that God was indeed promising me a life companion, but I was too afraid to believe, too afraid I would be hurt again…..To Be Continued.

2 comments:

  1. It is amazing how the Lord can and will speak to our hearts with just the right answer to our questions. Since we tend to be "dumb sheep" He patiently repeats Himself so we know we have heard from Him. Your story has ministered to me as well. Thank You

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  2. Yes, Terri, He certainly does - if only we can trust Him enough to wait, watch and listen for the answer.

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