Patience

 “Have patience in all things, but chiefly with yourself.

                                                                                                St. Francis DeSales

Image by Hans from Pixabay

Patience. Oh, how many times have I tested God’s patience? Thank goodness his patience and grace are endless, because if it all relied on my goodness, I’d be in real trouble. I can’t count how many times I fall from grace in just one day.

My most recent failure is patience while looking for a more affordable rental that ticks all my boxes. I want to run ahead and grab something, even if it requires me to pay double rent for a couple of months.  

My common sense says, maybe one month’s rent would not be unreasonable, but not two. After all, I’m not in L.A. or San Francisco, where rental properties are hard to find. I need to give it time. God has promised me He is preparing me a place. (And every day I’ve seen rainbows in my newsfeed, my devotions, and outside my window. Reminders that God never reneges on His promises.)

But I hate the not knowing, the second-guessing, and I admit, some anxiety over finding a place to call home for a few years. I want to urge God to work faster. Scripture reminds me I can’t hurry God. His timing is always perfect, even if His answers seem to be taking too long.

Swinging back to patience for myself, when I fall from grace, it’s easy to be overly remorseful, dwelling on the fall rather than God’s forgiveness and continued grace. However, each failure humbles me, reminds me I am imperfect and in dire need of God’s hand in my life.

“Thank you, Lord, for your grace, strength, and patience. I pray I learn how to have more patience with my circumstances, with others, and myself.” Amen.